THE FAMILY MEDIATION SERVICE
What is Family Mediation?
For couples who are splitting up family mediation is a chance to sit down together with an independent and impartial third-party, the mediator, and make arrangements for their future quickly, cheaply and without having to go to court. They could have been married or living together. They may or may not have children. They may need to work out plans for any number of things, including children, finance and property. But there may be step-parents or grandparents needing to work out details of contact with children; or parents whose situation has changed after separation and who need to work out new arrangements.
If someone is eligible for legal aid the service will be free, and if they have a solicitor they are required to be referred to mediation. But anyone can refer themselves or be referred by an advisor. Sessions can quickly be arranged near the parties throughout Lancashire, fees are reasonable, and sessions are at a time to suit.
But family disputes are not always about divorcing or separating couples.
There can be problems between parents and teenagers, between children about the care of their elderly parents, between grandparents and children about care of their grandchildren. Mediation can also help in these circumstances, and Lancashire Family Mediation Service is expanding to offer families in conflict an opportunity to settle differences before they become too hard to resolve.
To make a referral, or to refer yourself, or to discuss your situation, please contact us.
The Family Mediation Service Is
- confidential, impartial and independent
- Employs trained professional mediators who can help both parties
- Aims to help you agree a way forward and avoid disputes in court
Advantages of using family mediation
- the parties themselves decide the terms of agreement
- it can allow couples to maintain communication even after splitting up - crucial when children are involved
- it can help disputing family members to rebuild their relationship
- it offers a chance to hear and be heard in a safe and focused environment
- going to court is very expensive
You and Mediation
Mediation cannot work unless both partners are involved and it must be voluntary at all stages.The mediation process may take a number of sessions, depending on how many decisions need to be made and how complex they are. As a guide, mediation will take between two and four sessions. These will enable you to take legal advice and collect the information necessary to support your discussions.
What the mediator does…
● Meets with you and your ex (either together or separately depending on your circumstances and their style) for an initial
meeting. This gives you, your ex and the mediator the chance to work out exactly what issues are at stake and whether you’ll both
feel safe and comfortable discussing them face-to-face.
● Helps you and your ex to go through those issues, think of your options, decide whether they’d work in practice and come
to an agreement about what’s best. The mediator is there to make sure that both of you get a chance to put your side of the
story, particularly if one of you is better at arguing than the other.
● Gets both of you to fill out forms giving information about your finances. Be aware: you’ll have to sign these to confirm that the
information is correct.
● Puts together a document at the end of the sessions setting out your agreement in writing.
What the mediator doesn’t do…
● Make the decisions for you: you and your ex are in control.
● Take sides: they are simply there to smooth the progress of your own discussions.
The number of sessions you need will depend on the number of issues to be decided and how complicated they are. There will usually
be 2–4 sessions, each lasting about 11/2 hours
Your Children and Mediation
A number of statutes and cases have made it a requirement, or at the very least a strong expectation that the needs, wishes and feelings of children are taken into account where a legal action or administrative action affects them. They should therefore be informed, consulted or otherwise express their opinion as part of the process.
- Children Act 1989
- UN Charter for the Rights of the Child 1989
- European Charter of Human Rights 1996
- Human Rights Act 1998
- Mabon v Mabon (2005) EWC EW 634
- Every Child Matters agenda
Advantages
Child feels less powerless by being acknowledged
Child grows in self-esteem through consultation
Child invests in decision: the outcome is more likely to succeed
Provides a necessary safeguard
From the child’s perspective
What is happening is no secret – so don’t deny it: “The elephant in the room”
If your children are of an age of being able to understand such issues (usually 10 years and up) we will ask you if you would like your children to be consulted as part of the mediation process. We will also ask them, if you agree. The consultation will be confidential to the child, but all or part may be fed back to you, and in that way you may hear things that the children find it difficult to say to you directly. It can be very helpful to the making of a child friendly agreement.
Children generally hope for:
- A solution to the current and to future problems
- Maximisation of family relationships
- Child shares in problem solving
Confidentiality
Discussions in mediation are private and confidential and we do not prepare reports for Court or any other agency. If you have a solicitor, we will let him or her know about the progress of your case, but not about what you or your ex-partner have said during a mediation session.
The courts accept that people should have the opportunity to discuss their affairs without the fear that something said may be used against them in the court. Areas discussed in mediation cannot be used for or against you, or your ex-partner.
The only exception to confidentiality is where there is a risk or injury or harm to someone, particularly to a child.
Meeting your needs
Lancashire Family Mediation Service is committed to Equal Opportunities. The service can provide an interpreter for language translation or signers for people who are deaf. Please mention any particular needs when you contact the Service.
Mediation is not a substitute for legal advice
Mediation can be a better alternative to proceedings in court. However, the Service cannot offer legal advice. We encourage all parties to seek legal advice throughout the mediation process.
Paying for Mediation
If you qualify for public funding mediation on separation or divorce is free. This will be determined at the initial mediation assessment appointment. Each person’s eligibility is worked out separately, meaning that one or person may be entitled to free mediation when the other person is not. If you do not qualify for public funding, fees for mediation are charged on a sliding scale according to your gross income
Compare the Costs of splitting up
On average, a mediated case takes 100 days to resolve and costs 752 pounds, compared to 435 days and 1,682 pounds in cases where mediation is not used, according to the National Audit Office report published in March 2007.
If you are eligible for public funding (legal aid), family mediation is free. When you visit a solicitor they will explain to you that you will need to speak to a mediator. You will need to do this before funding is granted for your solicitor. If you get public funding for mediation you can also get free assistance from a solicitor who will ensure that any agreement reached is fair to you.
If you are not eligible for legal aid it will still be cheaper to mediate an agreement with a professional not-for-profit agency like us rather than leave it to your solicitor, who will charge much more. Compare the rates before you decide.
Meeting Places for mediation
We are able to offer mediation sessions throughout Lancashire including; Blackburn, Blackpool, Burnley, Chorley, Colne, Lancaster and Morecambe and Preston.
What to do next
To make a referral, To make a referral, or to refer yourself, or to discuss your situation, please contact us. or download a referral form from the REFERRAL FORMS section of this website, complete it and send it to us.
